It's love.

I'm home only this morning at 11am. Went back to secondary school ytd for teacher's day celebrations. stayed for awhile onlie. Then, went over to office with wenbin. Had training den went back home in the evening to fetch mum over to office for pulse test. Luckliy, mum's health is considered average and not too bad. She just nids to drink more water and do some exercise. How I wish I got lots of money so that I can get all those healh products home for my family. I'm really very sad and disappointed that my elder sis is against the idea of me working there. She says she hates pyramid structure and it's illegal. -.- i dun understand in wad way it is illegal . She really took away half of my initial confidence to do well in the company. She hopes that I can quit and rather me to go work part time. What's wrong now? Why cant she just support me for this once? I might be a failure all the while. Now that I really want to work hard and do well, I only see cold water splashing all over me. Tears just dripped, I dont know why I'm so affected by her comments. )):

Went back to hawker there den mit meiling and baoyu at 47. After which decided to go home and bath before mitting dearie cause he booked out again ytd :D baby reached home den waited for me at my house downstairs to fetch me to his house. watched tv at dearie's house den fell asleep till morning then home. LOLS. dear dear is so sweet to me recently and so nicee (: all the more I should treasure him and love him more. hees . babby, I wanna be ur bride, ur laopo, ur darling, ur dear, ur eveything . We've exchanged our rings so now you are my hubby lers. I love you dear. We are going out for our movie date later on (:

Sometimes I wonder why ppl changes overnite. It's scary.

Dear, i love you. I know you can read these der =p I meant wad I said to you alright? You are my everything, my most precious darling ~ muack
Dear, I want you to tag me hor :PPPPPPPP

There's just too little time for so many things

I am just too tired and drained for the past 1 week plus. I just knock out when I reached home ytd at around 2plus all the way till 10plus. In between I did wake up to reply messages and stuff but I slept back eventually. Will be going back to secondary school for teachers' day celebration later on bahs den to work at noon.

Dearie booked out and came to my house to accompany me while I do my assignment for LLA which is going to be due today. Finally finished! (: I love you baby. MUACKS ! :DD

im going to slp now. nites.

The Little Red Riding Hood

Version by Charles Perrault

Once upon a time there lived in a certain village a little country girl, the prettiest creature who was ever seen. Her mother was excessively fond of her; and her grandmother doted on her still more. This good woman had a little red riding hood made for her. It suited the girl extremely well that everybody called her Little Red Riding Hood.

One day her mother, having made some cakes, said to her: “Go, my dear, and see how your grandmother is doing, for I hear she had been very ill. Take her a cake, and this little pot of butter.”

Little Red Riding Hood set out immediately to go to her grandmother, who lived in another village.

As she was going through the wood, she met with a wolf, which had a very great mind to eat her up, but he dared not, because of some woodcutters working nearby in the forest. He asked her where she was going. The poor child, who did not know that it was dangerous to stay and talk to a wolf, said to him, “I am going to see my grandmother and carry her a cake and a little pot of butter from my mother.”

“Oh. Hurry and go on then! Don’t keep your grandmother waiting.” said the wolf to Little Red Riding Hood. She nodded her head and continued her journey to her grandmother’s house. An idea struck the wicked and cunning wolf and he went on to carry out his plan.

Finally, Little Red Riding Hood managed to arrive at her grandmother’s house safely. She gave the cakes and little pot of butter to her grandmother who was bed-ridden as she was too ill to get up. Her grandmother was elated to see her beloved grandchild coming to visit her and said to her: “My dear, I’m glad to see you coming over to visit me but it is a dangerous and tedious journey for a little girl like you to come alone. There lived a cunning wolf out there in the woods that might eat you up.” She gave Little Red Riding Hood a pat on her head as she talk. Little Red Riding Hood exclaimed: “Grandma, the wolf is not as bad as what you think; I did bump into him on my way here. But look! Grandma, I’m still safe and sound.” Grandma was shocked to hear that and immediately sat up holding Little Red Riding Hood’s hands tightly saying: “oh god! My dear, you must be cheated by the cunning wolf, he must be afraid that the woodcutters might kill him if he lays his hand on you so he pretended to be friendly to you. Please stay away from the wolf and be extremely careful on your way home!” Grandma let out a sigh.

Little Red Riding Hood who was very innocent and naïve nodded her head and set off back home. On the other hand, the wolf had already set up some traps in the woods to catch Little Red Riding Hood not knowing that the woodcutters had already got suspicious of his acts. The woodcutters decided to stay and hid in a corner to see what the wolf was up to. Little Red Riding Hood felt tired after a long walk and decided to take a rest in the woods on a log. The cunning wolf had already spotted her long ago and pretended to walk past her. Little Red Riding Hood was surprise to see him but still friendly despite grandma’s warning and waved to him. The wolf pretended to smile back and waved back while at the same time signaling her to go over to his side. Little Red Riding Hood who was still ignorant of his traps underground took her first step towards him and let out a loud scream. The next moment she was shouting and yelling away high up in the trees. The wolf began to laugh wickedly at her and said: “I’ve been waiting for this day for so long already, finally you are in my hands. Let me think of a better way to eat you up so that I can enjoy myself thoroughly.” Little Red Riding Hood was in tears, she blamed herself for being so gullible and not listening to grandma’s advice.

However, the wolf’s dream did not come true as the woodcutters rush up and saved Little Red Riding Hood. They caught the wolf and wanted to kill him while the wolf cried for mercy. Little Red Riding Hood being a magnanimous girl forgave the wolf and pleaded for him to the woodcutters to let him off. The woodcutters were in objection at first, however, seeing Little Red Riding Hood’s perseverance to plead for the wolf, they finally agreed but warn the wolf not to try any more tricks again or they would really kill him. The wolf kept in silence; he was touched by the kind and big hearted little girl.

After they released him, he walked towards Little Red Riding Hood, heads down mumbling out a ‘Sorry’. He felt remorseful and while he was about to go back home, Little Red Riding Hood ran towards him and said: “it’s okay, I don’t blame you for Mummy taught me, as long as someone is sincere in apologizing for his wrong deed, we should forgive and forget.” She held out her hand towards the wolf and her smile still as sweet as ever.


The story in pink are continued by me. It's for my LLA assignment. Is this story interesting enough? lols . Comments pls.

It's 3am near 4 and I'm still not asleep. I tink my heart & lungs are dying soon if I continue to sleep so late in the morning everyday. It's been near to 2weeks since I last slept more than 8hrs a day. I tink I barely get to sleep only 5-6hrs for 2 or 3 days. Cause I'll wake up at 6am every morning for school and end up dozing off in the bus or being a sotong for the day just like today. Many silly things happen. I shan't make a fool of myself here. LOLS.

Been majonging , It ain't good. I know. Cause I nid to concentrate on my studies. Yup, so tmr on I must start studying and resting and start to be more health conscious. Dearie's gonna get angry if I continue to sleep so late in the nite. Sorry my dear, I will try to go home early and sleep early der okay? I love ya too , hees. I know you care about me . I haven been eating proper meals either, it's either I eat lunch only or dinner only for one whole day. Perhaps can slim down right. Well, I'm dreaming cause I'm just putting on weight as days pass.

Bedtime!

You'll never know how much I love you.
How much I miss you ;
Deep down in my heart..

It's been a damn long time since I last updated. And nobody tagged me means nobody missed me )': I'll update the post about ah ma some other day . Cause tat post is saved in my lappy. As my internet was down the other time so i didnt managed to update.

I finally got to see my dear last nite aft missing him for one whole week. I went to work straight aft school. Went off at around 7plus den went back to mit the usuals, they ask me go weilong house majong. LOLS. den dearie sit behind help me, but in the end still lost $5. hahaha. Den he send me home at around 12plus. Sad. I'm afraid I wont be able to mit him before he book in today. Den I'll have to wait till sat den can see him again. anw, monday's a holiday for me too. but but but, sian! sigh !

Yea, I'm finally home. Haven slept well or enough for 3-4 days alrdy, I look superly superly more uglier than usual :X Dark eye rings and all, Please go away soon (: luckily,pimples didn't join them. HAHAHA! Im crazy.

Been staying over night till morning 5am plus at ah ma's wake for the past few days. Helping around to serve drinks and all. Well, most of the time I was just slacking away & looking out for cats. I often went over to ah ma's alter and could stare at her photo for a long long time cos ah ma was simply too pretty! You wont believe it, tat photo was take like when she was in her forties. Where can you find such a beauty! Look at the photo!!!

Den since last nite, we had been kneeling and standing to pray for ah ma. Ah ma, we want you to go peacefully and no nid to worry anything okay? Go up to heaven and Yi Xia will take care of you, she's staying just beside you . Yixia is my cousin who had pass away years ago. She's also ah ma's most doted grandchild. Nobody dared to inform ah ma about her death but now, hopefully they can reunite in heaven and she will look aft ah ma. All of us suffered muscle cramps from all the kneeling and standing.. lols.

On the second night, some of my classmates came. Cherie,Grace,Weijie and Xinsheng . Very much appreciated (: and also thanks to all those who contributed to the 白金 ;D Im quite surprise they came. WenBin also came on the first night together with cheeyong and gary. Den on the last nite, Meihua came (: I reallie appreciate all those who came. Thanks alot.
Ytd, around midnight 12 am plus went to Royal lan with meihua and her brother. Till around 3am went back to the wake. Some professional casino gamblers set their store at our place. -.-Heard from my auntie they tried to steal our white t-shirts, wth! This kind of songka clothing you also want to wear ah? Fuck off lahs. Not enough money to buy for urself tell us lah, we kelian you give u some more! damn angry can!

And the last nite, it's supposed to be crowded with alot of ppl. But I tink most of the people are scared away by all these gamblers. -.-''' I only slept for 3hours at ah ma's house. Den come down pray and send ah ma off lerhs.. then to bright hill, ah ma was being cremated . Aft tat went to eat vegetarian food den back to ah ma house there pack things . den around 2plus went back to bright hill again to collect ah ma's ashes.
Then stayed around at ah ma's house awhile. Then cousin drove me to old airport road there buy dinner for ah yi they all. HAHAS. we bought lots of yummy food! we ate alot too especially me, I ate extra extra rice ): Im gonna gain so much KGGGGGGGSSSSSSSSSS~! FAINTS! Den cousin drove us home. Tada~ Im home .

Tmr I'm going to work.Tonight I'm going to hawker.I miss everyone there ;D
& not forgetting my dear dear, he sent me a super sweet msg this morning :P (secret)dear, I miss you too ! I waiting for you to book out this tue :DDDDDDDDDDDDDD LOVES!

Im home from ah ma's wake. It just started today. I woke up in the morning at 9.30am bath and changed while waiting for aunties they all come my house pray to my father's side ah gong . Aft which, Er jie came and we went off leaving my aunties in my house. Da jie drove us over to ah ma's wake. Saw those ppl wearing clothes for ah ma, they like so violent lahs. Drop her hand lying in the air, I see ler was like they still can ignore until do finish everything den put back. Den we had to pray and kneel aft tat they put ah ma into the coffin. Den we walked 3 rounds around while the monk was praying. Tat was the last time we will ever get to see ah ma lers. Cause they are closing up the coffin, not letting anyone to see anymre.

Tonight I'll be going over there to shou ye. Dun noe when I'll be back to blog. Anything just text me or call me bahs.

REST IN PEACE AH MA ~ SIGH !
Mum called me while I was on my way back den told me ah ma was not going to make it anymore. She told me to rush home and babysit while she & Dad are rushing down the hospital. Den when I was at around ubi or eunos, she called again and said ah ma had passed away. ): I used to tink tat I wouldn't feel quite a thing cause I wasn't very close to ah ma. Since young, I'll onlie get to see her occasionally on NEW YEAR or her BIRTHDAY. And sometimes, visit her with mummy. But now, I wun get to see her forever ): When Im older, she got this illness - senile dilema 老人痴呆症 . Aft which her memory starts deterioating( how shld i spell it?) badly until she couldn't recognise most of us . She would alwaes ask who I was whenever we visited her. But the more I tink, the more I felt sad. But I controlled my emotions all the way till I reach home when my parents went out, I broke down immediately infront of a little baby. I onlie had the courage to cry infront of her. I didnt want anyone to know I was crying or I cried. Cause Im guilty, I onlie visited ah ma once eversince she was in the hospital. I am such a unfillial grandchild as well. But no matter wad, I hope ah ma is happy now cause she wun suffer those pain anymore. No matter where you are, ah ma, I hope you will be happy and safe (:


As a result, I wun be going to work recently till everything is settled. I must be hardworking and work hard, earn lots of money for mummy to spend. And give sis back those money she used to paid for my handphone bills which alwaes exploded the limit like crazy. Life's really fragile.

This is my 504th post (: Didn't noe I've been blogging for so long already . Times reallie flies and pass by so quickly without you realising it. Soon it'll be our month anniversary and soon to years den to marriage :X am I tinking too much ? lols . Well, it's only a matter of time. But we should start planning for our future now lers, it's seriously not very early. Soon, we'll be growing up and looking for more stable jobs and then getting ready for marriage. Then, we nid to save up a big sum of money to do so.

Ytd finished my work quickly in school den rushed home bath & went for interview. Will be working with my secondary school classmate, WenBin, in future as sales manager selling some health products. Well, shall not share too much about this lers until my job is stable. Anyone looking for jobs can give me a text message, I got good lobang but not so soon . Only for those who are patient can wait for sometimes as i nid to stablise myself first. Our working place is at Eunos, MDIS. I wore normal t-shirt, shorts wit cardigan, & went in to see all guys in formal attire, ladies in formal as well as dresses. I felt like running home. LOLS. but it's okay lahs, now tat I noe already, I will start to dress more appropriately when I go to work. Today's my first day of training, wish me good luck ! (:

The interview onlie took some time. but i proceed on to attend their short slide show followed by a talk. which onlie ended at 11pm. I was sorry for being unable to answer any calls or reply messages instantly. I apologise for these. And sorry meiling, I promised to mit you to teach you maths der but end up you go home I also haven reached. Den Dearie text me saying he booked out and going home ler. So he waited for me at our hse bus stop den he sent me home :D
Dearie looks so tired and he dosen't wan to sleep, so naughty. Play dota till morning den book in again lers ): nxt tue den can book out again. Baby, I gonna miss you so much ): I love you. Do takecare hor, must slp more and rest more. Alwaes so bad, dun listen to me. den later fall sick again . Muacks.

And today I got to go for work so cannot meet you my dearest best friend. hope you can forgive me. Please let me noe when you free agains, I will go meet you. Definitely. Really sorry tat I cant make it again this time. I owe you one okay.

& shiguan, if you reading my blog, just wanna tell you. Do cheer up and dun tink so much :D

FRIDAY - 15 August 2008

School was normal. HAd AFD CA2, petty cashbook was quite easy but not the case study. Hopefully can get at least a B. I must reallie buck up lerhs. Went bedok mrt mit Meiling pei her go lavender buy FBT shorts.. LOLS.

Went bugis alone aft which to buy some food home to eat. Kinder tired & sleepy, went home and slept the whole aftnoon til nite. Sorry for shutting off my phone cause I wanted some time alone to tink. Didnt wan to vent my anger on anyone who happens to call or msg me. Mit Jisheng at nite and Baoyu go hawker, while they eating I went off. Went walking around on my own. Finally I sorted out my thinking and everything is solved. Thanks GOD for sending a guardian angel to help me. Then came jisheng n baoyu so we walk over to 120 find the rest. Went home with Peishan to find dear dear.. He was watching tv. lols. Actually wanted to pei him till late then go home derhs . end up stayed overnight at his place while the rest all went cycling . dots . Not very tired and couldn't fall asleep & dearie ask me to shut my eyes den slowly will slp. Listen to him den end up had a nightmare, woke up & cried. Dearie was awaken by me & shocked to see me crying . Lols . Then he hug hug me to slpp.. Dear, Im so lucky you are by my side to protect me and console me. Muacks . But still, we sleep and woke up many times, all the way till morning when I heard all of them coming back . So we got up & went out to chat with them at ard 7plus am . ( to be continued)

SATURDAY - 16 AUGUST 08

So they decided to go swimming at around 8 plus. Den chased me home to get my stuff . DEn suay suay I got menses -.-''' So Peishan gave me her tampon to use for swimming . dots lah . My dear pangsen me, went there to sleep under the shade. humps . First time use tampon, super weird lah the feeling . OMG! den they all keep di-siao ing me . Feel like slapping them cause they dun noe my pain at all . onlie peishan understand and noes how I feel . Went to eat breakfast aft tat, super hungry cos ytd never eat at all. Den back to dearie's house watched them majong again . This time play with money, lols! Ah Kiat win the most lor, can treat us eat liao =p hahas . Den went Tnet sing song the whole day till nite went hawker slack awhile . Den they went back to dearie's house majong again . I played awhile den watched them play . Super tired. Went home den slp lerhs .

Dearie, Im glad I have you by my side once again to protect me and love me. I wont forget the nite spent with you . Hees . Seeing you happy is the most important thing for me now (:

SUNDAY - 17 August 08

Woke up at onlie 1plus in the afternoon.. Bath then went over to dearie's house pei him . End up he dota-ing so long . humps . LOLS. Den didn't noe Peishan awake till she shouted at me. So went t room and chat with her . Practically slacked the whole day at her house . Den got cook maggi mee for dearie also, his mum so cute. See me cook den say he DA SHAO YE ah . HAHAS. Slept awhile in the evening while dearie went to dota again =.= Stupid Dota . LOLS . But nvm lahs , actually dearie aftnoon 3-4plus booking in der den say wan pei wo so he 8pm den book in but end up also his friend keep delaying time till around 9plus den he go back.. hahas.. So dear pei me go hawker find the usuals den we eat our dinner.. Im so tired.. gonna go slp lerhs.. Nites everyone.

Dear , Mus take care of yourself when you back in camp & dun fall sick again :D I will miss you lots der . Waiting for you to book out soon .. Muacks..

Im weak I admit. I dun noe wad to do ler. I wan to be nice, I wan to change. but why do i face such negative results? In a r/s, it is understandable tat both parties got their own friends, own private time. They should compromise to each other, leave some private time for each their own. Seriously, I noe this very well. In mine r/s, it could be a good thing tat most of our usual hangout are those we both noe. However, I still noe when to accompany my bf, when to accompany my friends. It's been 2days onlie. I dun expect much. I will be patient. I noe things wun just get back to normal immediately. But sometimes, wad u said reallie hurts me too. All I wanted was onlie some coax-ing or mayb encouragement. Where exactly am I wrong again by trying to be caring & nice to you? Sorry, if I had reallie made you feel so fan. And Im sorry to those who cared for me, I was not worth it aft all.

我只不过想要一点点你的关心，难道这样也有错吗？
我真的害怕你会离开我
如果真的觉得我很烦，对不起
三天了，我只不过见到你一天，这样也算多吗？
请你教教我这么做在对，我累了
是你，决定我的伤心

Just finished reading this gal, Caiwei's blog which is linked from shiguan's blog. Life's reallie fragile. Can sort of understand how she feels losing her bestest friend. Cause I have ever lost a friend before. Same situation also to an Accident. Now I noe, both car and bike accident kills. My friend pass awae due to a bike accident while her friend to a car accident. But the poor thing is, her friend was the passenger. & it seems like the driver is still not remorseful at all. It's such a pity. The gal was also 19 onlie just like Bk (my friend who pass awae). She was descibed to be a very nice person, an angel to her friends. Why do fate want to take all these kind ppl away from our life and let those coward, heartless ppl continue living in this world?

Today. during my journey back home in bus. I was also tinking of BK, his sweet smile I can recall. I kept thinking and thinking, why did heaven want to take him away from all of us.. he was reallie such a nice person.. It's reallie sad.. I feel sad for his gf too.. I can alwaes feel tat how sad she will be and how torturous it was for her having to undergo such pain of losing her most beloved bf.. All these gives me a new light or direction in my life.. Cause I get to understand more and more and will learn to reallie cherish all my loves ones before they are gone.. and because onlie in this life will we meet, will we be together.. all these is fate.. It also teaches me not to give up our life so easily..

If they can undergo all these pain and sadness, and at the same time having to handle normal schoolwork and daily life.. why cant I do the same when I have much much more lesser pain than they do?

Kopped this from carol who kopped from baoyu who kopped from liangpieng LOLS!

A : You like to drink.
B : You like people.
C : You are really silly.
D : You like to eat.
E : You like to play with cat.
F : You are dead sexy.
G : You never let people tell you what to do.
H : You have a very good personality and good looks.
I : Easy to be with.
J : People Adore you.
K : You're wild and crazy.
L : Everyone loves you.
M : Best kisser ever.
N : Best bf/gf anyone could ask for.
O : Easy to fall in love with.
P : You are popular with all types of people.
Q : You are a hypocrite.
R : You're loyal to those you love.
S : Fuckin crazy.
T : Awesome kisser.
U : You really like to chill.
V : Awesome in bed
W : You are very broad minded.
X : You love sports.
Y : Best bf/gf anyone could ask for.
Z : Always ready.

Name : CRYSTAL POH EN EN

C: You are really silly. ( tat's true)
R : You're loyal to those you love. ( onlie to e one I reallie love)
Y : Best bf/gf anyone could ask for.( bf, do u agree?)
S : Fuckin crazy.( yup, im damn crazy at times)
T : Awesome kisser.( ask my bf bahs )
A : You like to drink.( yahs.)
L : Everyone loves you.( i dun tink so)

P : You are popular with all types of people.(depends bahs )
O : Easy to fall in love with. ( is it? not many ppl likes me also -.-)
H : You have a very good personality and good looks.(if onlie tat's true)

E : You like to play with cat.(Im afraid of cats =/)
N : Best bf/gf anyone could ask for.( this have to ask my bf le)

E : You like to play with cat.
N : Best bf/gf anyone could ask for.

Im back to post finally. Been tired with schooling cause I seriously hate to travel here and there now. Just for tat few hours of lessons, I have to waste roughly 2 hours to travel to and fro. And friends, I not emo okays, dun worry. I just abit tired and bored. Mayb a lil sad cause my baby is still sick n having fever. Reallie dun wish to hear anymore stupid comments if you dun noe anything at all, have you ever spared a thought for others or rather ur friends before you actually open ur mouth and make these meaningless comments? C'mon , we're all friends. Why are we even treating one and other in this manner? As though we are enemies. It onlie hurts urself when u lose e trust of ur friends. Nobody is perfect, so am I. If Im changing, why cant you change for e better too? Alright, I admit Im reallie kinder tired of life recently. Got crazy thoughts of dying too but no worries, I have sort things out alrdy. I wun do any silly things der . Exams is just a month away, and holidays just next door to it. Baby, get well soon (: imu

是不是每对牵着手的情侣都很快乐？
我们也是吗？
这一次我不会再放手了
你真的能从新接受我吗？
我要用我的一切让你变成最幸福快乐的人
我要跟你一起慢慢变老
一直爱着你

Everything i s finally ove r . Though I'm still quite troubled by some things. Well, everything will be fine soon (: & now I reallie glad he willing to give me this chance again . BABYLOVE, I will cherish you & love you even more der :D muacks .

School was fine. Short day indeed. nothing much to update about also. Ytd, wanted to cook chocolate dip with marshmallow together with SHANSHAN(: but then we failed. Cause put TOO much water lerhs . HAHAS. Den was like very disgusting sia . We also make some jelly, but too little seasoning so not very sweet but still edible :) Den went down hawker finally to have my dinner at around 10plus, super late lahs . den around 11plus, dear sent me home :D LoveLoves(:

Tonight you'll decide whether I'll fall or not. Im waiting . hopefully it's not as bad as wad I tink.

HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY TO JIANHUA ! (:
Im sorry, didnt sing bdae song for you. =X
Hope you did enjoy the surprise they planned for you.

I have faced it bravely, didnt I? After being a coward for so long, not knowing wad I really want. Finally, I realised who I really need the most. My dear, Im the one who needed you most. ): is it too little too late ? The moment I saw you again, I knew I still love you the most. It hurts most to see you turning ur back against me & walking off. I know I was the one at fault, you dun have any wrong . You got ur own choice to decide . I was stupid to do all those things . Crying serves no purposes at all . Cause it wun let you come back to me again ): You gave me many chances yet I didnt cherish them . All these punishments, I deserve it, serves me right . hereby, I still want to apologise to you. Hopefully, there's a miracle.

Because of this, many ppl have been hurt. Im the culprit behind it bahs. Sorry to all of you. ):
If it hadn't been my indecisiveness, things wouldn't have turn out this way bahs . Anw, Im still glad we are still good friends now. Thanks for being there whenever I needed. I know we all need time. Hopefully, all these would be over soon.

Can jolly well ignore my previous post alright / im selfish, im unreasonable. i never care abt you at all.. i dun noe anything as you never tell me. how am i supposed to noe? I noe I had been selfish. left you at the start, everything was my fault, I started them. You were my victim, all i can say is sorry, im a bad gal.

Welcome back. But Im sorry it might not been a happy scene for you. I noe you've read and know everything . But I just want to hear how you tink and wad you have decided. dun have to hesitate anymore bah, just tell me ur decision and I will respect it. I know abt all the ridiculous things I've done, you might not be able to accept it and i dun expect you to too. But I still love you .

Im so tired of my life revolving around me telling me to make decisions for every single thing i do. So tired of being unable to make a choice, so tired of being a coward. I just like to make myself lose evrything, dont I?

Ytd went out with Meiling and Timothy to Fareast Plaza walk walk. Saw many many nice things but i want to buy new clothes!! ): never see anything I want very much. Suddenly, Timothy ans a call den went missing -.-'''

Left me and Meiling 2 sotong at there, almost dun noe how to go back home. Heng, we still noe how to go walk to the Mrt station. Took train back den went hawker mit the usuals. But actually onlie got Ah bee, Weilong and Ah qiang.

Cycled in the rain on the way to weilong's hse. Den we played majong. First time keep winning sia, i tink YIN qi too strong liao. LOLS. Stupid Weilong keep disturbing me, dun wan let me win -.-'''

Today went expo mrt collect the dress which I bought from blogshop. Aft tat went tampines mit Meiling, Baoyu and Timothy . Walk walk around & tada, home Im (:


我最害怕的日子快到了。我能怎么办？
你到底在想什么？

Thanks for being there for me during those days when Im really sad & down. I appreciate it. Hopefully everything can be solved in a manner which everyone is happy,although it's quite impossible. But I reallie hope no matter wad in the future, we might not be so close anymore, but I'll alwaes be there whenever you nid like u do to me. I'll never forget all these memories which we shared :D ilu

I haven been posting properly for quite sometime. Well, most weekends have been spent going for night cycling . And they are really fun days when all of us hangs out together (: I keep these beautiful memories forever in my heart :D I reallie do enjoy each and every night cycling which all of us went. Though I might not be cycling most of the times, but at least all of us were able to share the joy and fun together.

We had been cycling mostly from chup lao to east coast den to changi . Below are the pictures we took 2 weeks ago which we broke our record, they cycled and lombang the girls from chup lao to east coast den to changi den up to tampines til pasir ris park. Though I look super retard in all the pictures but well, who cares? They are all beautiful memories to me :) Lols! Super tiring for them lahs, kelian lerhs. Haha. Ain't they great?

Well, all of us might not be so close, always hanging out together or going for night cycling in the near future. But I believe, each and every one of us will never forget all these memories which we shared. It's fate tat we all met & became friends :DD iloveyou guys lots! ((: and also not forgetting my 2 drivers who always waste ur energy most lombanging me this pig -.-''' Though they both also want to quit ler but nvm, I still very touched each time they 'zai' wo. Loves :)

JIEMIN ; CRYSTAL

CRYSTAL; JIANHUA; WEITONG

JIEMIN; CRYSTAL; ROY

JIEMIN; CRYSTAL

WEILONG; CRYSTAL; WEITONG

CRYSTAL; AH KIAT

WEILONG; CRYSTAL

MEILING; CRYSTAL

MEILING; CRYSTAL; JIEMIN

MEILING; CRYSTAL; JIEMIN

Role play tmr!! Please wish our group good luck. (: Hopefully, I dun rmb the dialogues wrongly. well, hopes everything turns out well.

Yes, I still want to be great friends with you like in the past. Actually there issen't really anything to settle or say anymore. Or mayb just to make things clear bah. Well, I dont want to continue writing abt all these anymore, there is no point & it dont help. Only makes us more miserable bahs. No one is hiding away from the truth, we have faced them bravely. He dun have to make any decison unless we ask anything from him. If you still treat us as friends, den dun avoid us and we can all be just like before. Mayb it was also due to my neglicent, cause I should have noticed you like him from the start bahs. Let's be friends when you have cooled down (:

Firstly, I would like to say SORRY to Baoyu. Hopefully, you can accept my apology. I know how I've hurt you by backstabbing you to him . I admit I was too rash & regretted not thinking clearly before doing anything .


Well, my eye is still painful. Got a bad feeling something is gonna happen. It's been 2days. Mayb it's also good bah. I deserve some punishment.


What a friend have I been? Dun tell me Im kind, nice or good or wad so ever when it ain't the truth. Now, I judge myself as a hypocrite. I've been so tired of them tat Im chasing everyone else away by being one. What an excuse, Crystal. Im so disappointed in you. Having grown up till this age, I still dun know how to behave myself. I haven been a fillial daughter, neither a kind sister or even a nice friend. I'm looking down on myself,despising myself now. All the bad deeds I've done, I'm sorry for it. Perhaps no amount of apologises can help but may some good deeds redeem them. I dun noe how I should be like, what kind of characters I should possess. Is it better to be a bad person rather than a nice one? I used to be average but now, I guess, Im a bad one. So when I die now or later, I dun wish for anyone to mourn nor come to my funeral. It's not worth it.


Who am I? Hardly or should I say none can answer this question at all. By saying ur name, ur personalities or wad you like to do , you're just describing urself & not telling who you really is. So I should say, I dont know who I am at all. As a friend, I failed. As a daughter, I failed too. As a lover, I cant say so cause there are still times I succeed though I failed in the end,sounds contradicting though -.-'''



I did say I dont like him in the past. But recently,since we drifted apart, there are many things, many words we didnt tell each other & many things we didnt face too. At the beginning, I onlie treated him as a friend and now,its still the same, all of us are friends. But I must say I like him too.I cant make a decision cause in my heart, I still love wq, he holds a place in my heart.I dont know wad is fake or real.Or perhaps, Im just a flirt. Mayb feelings are weird, it just leads you to do things which you'll never do in the past. Though we like the same guy,and it wun affect us, is tat true? If it didnt affect us, we wun be as cold as strangers now already. Lastly, I still wan to say, there is not RIGHT or WRONG in liking someone, & you dont have to give up someone because of someone. Dun have to bear all the pain urself, what is the point of hurting urself, when you dun reallie mean to give up? End result is still, everyone will still continue brood over this matter and sad. Mayb I will jealous or should I say we will jealous. But it unavoidable. Mayb the one who hurts most is him, who is trapped in between us not knowing to forward or to stop. Talking to any of us makes the other jealous or sad, this is wad he's going through. He's right, all of us are onlie friends now, who knows wad will happen in the future right? And of cos I wan to be a friend, not a rival. Hope you wun get the wrong idea. Im unsure of myself too, this is my bad. Tat's why I used to say Im hurting you guys. So now, let's stop saying who hurts who. Just continue like how we are, just pursue ur happiness or be friends. No more agony, no more sadness. No more avoiding each others, it will onlie give those big mouths more things to say, more things to gossip. But mayb sadness or disappointment cannot be avoided, in wadever we do, I believe in preparing for the worst. sigh .Wad I said might not be right, but just hope its of some use. All of us are so tired over this issue already.

I noe you'll be disappointed to noe and see all these when you are back,Im sorry love. I've let you down time & again. You wun have trust in me again,I understand. I wun blame you too. But Im really waiting for you to come back to solve all these.I've got so much to say, so many misses for you.

In this seventeen years of my life, many ppl had left footprints in me. Some left everlasting prints which I then learn something from.There were those ppl who taught me how to distinguish right & wrong, not forgetting those who taught me wad is love & care. Of course there are some ppl who totally changed my life,these are really shocking impacts which I never imagined.That particular event was the turning point of my life,which changed everything.Im tired of all this nonsense coming from me, why cant I just settle down with someone I love? Why do things alwaes crop up? Mayb I should just blame it on myself,I've been childish.I cant think well,cant decide.Not even a million sorry can be use to amend this wrong in me, when will I change and be back to old me? Friends who had been real supportive & there for me when Im down, I truly appreciate it. thank you pals,mayb all of us have drifted but never in mind.Everyone has their own good & bad, nobody is perfect.We should accept our friends for how they are, shouldn't we? however, there's still a limit to tolerance,when someone reallie cross the line,everything just explode, dun they? Regretting is not a solution to the problem.But reflect on myself, how good have I been? Mayb I just dun deserve any friends. All the memories of those moments which I spent with any friend wil alwaes be wit me(:

Im leaving soon. do takecare !

Oh well. I've been blogging rubbish. How crappy can I get? Went cycling again last nite. It was quite tiring as we ride to changi again. Well, I was beening lombang so cannot say tired, wad I mean is it's tiring for those riders :X & passengers also quite tired der lor .

Mayb I shouldn't have tried to help, seems like it becomes more than a burden den help. Sorry! Hmm,went changi and they had nasi lemak again. My eyes is like a lil swollen,due to heatiness I guess. It's painful when I blink.

We took 2hours to come back to chup lao. Credits to Weilong, Ah qiang, Ah bee & ah wee. They were the drivers and Ah bee worse, had to drag a bike back cause tyre bom chek. Well. I've been labelled a pig lerh. -.-''' I slept for 11hours from morning 7am plus till 6plus. I be going down to hawker mit meiling & her bro for dinner. Tmr's school again ):

I dislike going to school. Just make me feel so out.

I know we can never be so close again bahs. Mayb it's too hard to you. Much much more time will be needed. It's reallie weird, I dun know how to face you again lerhs. Really sorry my gal.

爱的来源是什么？为什么让人幸福快乐也能让人悲哀痛苦？

CHEERS ADELINE.
I ALWAYS BE THERE FOR YOU.
TAG ME IF YOU'VE SEEN THIS.
THOUGH YOU CHOOSE TO GIBE UP, AT LEAST U HAVE THE COURAGE (:
DUN REGRET WAD U HAVE DECIDED ON ALRIGHTS?
FRIENDS WILL ALWAES BE THERE ;D
THIS SHALL BE MY TAG TO YOU.

I've been awaken up to worship my ah ma this morning .
Shags! Cause I am tired after ytd's cycling and all .
Well, I might not be back for some time bahs.
Will be back onlie when Im better :D


我不想哭，我也不会哭的。
这一切都是一场梦，对吗？
承诺是为了什么？不能守的承诺为什么还要说？
对不起，是我太傻了。
一切已经结束，我们都将会变回从前的陌生人。
我的错最大，错在不懂自己的心在想什么，不懂爱。
我真的很幼稚，是时间长大了，不能再这样了。
我讨厌你，傅恩恩，你一点爱的勇气都没有。
说再多的话也改变不了事实，我到底还在留恋什么？
梦完了，醒醒吧！

Goodbye, at least you were brave enough to make a choice.

Just home from cycling.
Cycled to East Coast Jetty there slack, see them fishing .
Well, perhaps I've made a wrong decision to go.
Some reasons are also because I kept having cramps.
Now my poor stomache is grumbling, mayb due to not having dinner last nite.
Lunch onlie eat maggi mee .
I nid to go on diet, Im fat lerhs.
):

I'll never fall for promises again.
It's too beautiful a lie..
Thanks for everything, take care.

I will respect ur decision .
If you tink I'll be happy, so be it.
As long as you are happy, you can do wadever you want.
I know you are facing alot of problems.
Now, I dont wan t be a problem too.
It's good tat you made a choice.
I cant say Im happy for you but mayb I cant force out a grats.

已经受伤的我没力气在说什么了。
反正你开心就好，这样我也比较好过。
虽然失望但我还是祝你幸福
我不会妨碍你的生活了
我们会走在没有对方的新路上